


i want you to be happier

by freeze_your_heart



Category: Avatar: Legend of Korra
Genre: Angst, Asami Sato-Centric, Emotional Hurt, F/F, F/M, Heavy Angst, Hurt No Comfort, IS THIS JUST PROJECTION, Korra/Asami Sato-centric, Maybe - Freeform, One-Sided Attraction, One-Sided Relationship, Past Korra/Asami Sato, Song: Happier (Bastille), anyway
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-17
Updated: 2021-02-17
Packaged: 2021-03-12 10:28:01
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 892
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29508300
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/freeze_your_heart/pseuds/freeze_your_heart
Summary: Soon enough, the rain stopped, the evening falling upon the hour, leaving Asami alone with her thoughts. She could not change the narrative. As much as she liked to kid herself that she had just as much of an equal shot as Mako did, she knew that she had already missed her chance. She knew that no matter what, in whatever story this was, Korra would now always choose him. And why wouldn't she? He was perfect, he was brave in his expression of feelings, and most important of all, he didn't leave Korra behind.tdlr; asami and korra have a complicated past. asami needs to move on.
Relationships: Korra/Asami Sato, Korra/Mako (Avatar)
Comments: 1
Kudos: 14





	i want you to be happier

Asami fell in love with Korra once before.

She was much younger, much more naive. She wrote her letters nightly, sealed with wax in a yellowed envelope, addressed, but never sent. It was young, teenage, one-sided love. And eventually, she grew out of it. She chose new people, countless new people to fill the space that she was too scared to ask Korra to fill.

She left her behind.

But after all the mistakes, after every wrong person, the sun finally rose, the morning shedding light on old truths. Her feelings for Korra were back at full force. The morning light shone on what they had become now- distant friends. Asami felt the familiar longing to be by her side, the aching to be close to her in every way possible. She wanted to see her bright, translucent smile glow upon her face like something from heaven. 

Every time she did not tell Korra, Asami's heart stung with yearning, an ugly impulse to blurt it out. Every moment between them was filled with things that were left unsaid, words that just could not be taken back. After all, she had not been blind to the presence of Mako. However much Asami denied it, however much Korra denied it, they both knew how the story was going to end. 

"I'm in love with you," she finally said, the words hanging in the air between them. The weight was heavy, almost as heavy as the rain shattering around them against the sidewalk. 

"Why are you telling me this...?" Korra slowly asked in reply, stricken with shock. 

"I don't know what else to do," Asami replied, opening her mouth to elaborate with words she was so fond of, words she repeated several times before but none of them coming out. Instead, she opted to add, "I can't be the only one who feels something."

"You can't just..." Korra took a step back from her, striking fear into her heart. "You're not blind. We did have something. You know I loved you once. But you chose everyone else, absolutely every other person on this planet instead of me." The words came out rather harsh as if she had been holding them back for years. "You can't just come running to me once you've had enough. I'm not your second choice." 

"I'm not your second choice, either!" Asami retorted, hurt and bitterness seeping through her tone. "You're right, I'm not blind. I see the way Mako looks at you. I see the way you look at him. But I can't..." She trailed off. "I can't change the way I feel about you." 

"You can't," she echoed, "I wish we could have a shot, too." A wish was all that Korra's words would ever be. "But things are different now." Her voice sounded sorrowful and worst of all, distant.

"Tell me if you choose him," Asami whispered to her, holding their hands tightly, as the rain poured all over both of their skin. She let go as quickly as she grabbed them, walking off, unwilling to look back. She knew she was being dramatic.

Soon enough, the rain stopped, the evening falling upon the hour, leaving Asami alone with her thoughts. She could not change the narrative. As much as she liked to kid herself that she had just as much of an equal shot as Mako did, she knew that she had already missed her chance. She knew that no matter what, in whatever story this was, Korra would now always choose him. And why wouldn't she? He was perfect, he was brave in his expression of feelings, and most important of all, he didn't leave Korra behind. The image of Korra and Mako brought all sorts of sick feelings, twisting Asami's insides over and over again. But she was supposed to be both of their friends. 

So the next day, they looked each other in the eye, a mutual agreement to pretend like everything was okay. But she knew Korra would never tell her that she chose Mako. That was left unsaid. They had run their course, Asami knew that, but maybe they could act like friends once more. Running away from the problem with breathy laughs and witty banter seemed like the perfect solution, but she could not bring herself to do it.

And only for a single moment, she wanted to run back, beg Korra to take her. She wanted to bear her entire heart to her, revealing years of built-up feelings, wrapped in a desperate wish to have her choose Asami. 

But her pride was too strong. She would not fall victim to a few pesky feelings about a now distant friend. She only wanted to see her smile, she wanted to be the light, but she knew the only way she could do that was by running away. She needed to leave Korra and Mako and everything else behind. The past would never catch her this way. 

Even if seeing them together made her sick inside. 

Even if she did not want to leave her only source of joy. 

Even if she was being dramatic.

She would not stand in the way of either of their happiness. She wouldn't. She couldn't. 

But she sure as hell would feel the guilt and selfishness for wishing that she could have what she couldn't anymore.

**Author's Note:**

> no happiness. only pain.


End file.
